Jezebel's Request

 

I was thinking about the woman at the well.  How she came to fetch water at mid day when the sun was hottest to avoid the other ladies.  How she was an adulterer and didn’t much seek to change her ways.  How she was with a man who was not her husband the very moment Jesus spoke to her.  How Jesus did indeed speak to her.  The fact that he called her out on her sins and had a conversation with the lowest of the low.  How he still offered her living water.

Jesus is my favorite person.  His love is amazing and I wish I could comprehend just how big his love is for me.  I think if I really got it, Like REALLY  comprehended the enormity of his sacrifice and love – I would run through the streets unashamed too.

I think of the woman saved from those casting stones.  She didn’t defend herself, she had resigned herself to her fate.  Jesus stepped in and saved her from the stones.  Jesus is the only one with the right to throw a stone and he had none to throw.  Jesus saved her and showed her the right way to go. 

I don’t know why but I have a very soft spot for these women in the bible.  These Jezebels.  These women who have nothing to offer according to those standards and yet Jesus looks them in the face and deems them necessary.  Jesus gives them worth and direction.  Jesus. I identify with these women.  I know what its like to stand against the stones.  with my pride the only saving grace lest I fall.  Not necessarily shunned for my promiscuity per se, but I get it. 

Jesus stands the line for me. He has always stood up for me.  I just allow my brokenness to speak louder than his healing.  Jesus is the most gentle love I have ever experienced.  a tender word like a gentle caress across the cheek.  His love like a warm fire after a cold winters day.  His face, the only one my soul longs to touch.  He offers me cold water that will never fade, that quenches the soul.  He draws the line and shows me the way. 

My brokenness always gets in the way of his freedom however.  I never feel “good” enough.  My heart wont trust the head, my head can’t make the heart believe. Something about Jesus makes me hold on.  His love probably.  One day I hope to love people like him. That’s all this Jezebel could ask for – that and to accept his love properly.  My brokenness always gets in the way.

 

By his grace

Jackie